I have come to the realiztion that there are many immature people who live in new york.  Who ever bigray2 is they need to get a fucking life and stop commenting in my journal...I DONT LIVE IN FUCKING NEW YORK ANYMORE... get over it... i know u want this but ya cant get it so get over ur lil gay high school crush and move on asshole....

anyway... wow its been be a lonnnngggg ass time since i have written in here!!! WOW... lol well thats the bell i g2g ttyl bye!

Well I know its been a lonnnggg time but here I am again...pouring out my feelings into this stupid online journal... But anyway....

Today I stayed home from school and I watched 2 hours of Dawson's Creek.  I know it sounds stupid but I almost cried.  When we were younger; me, steph, laken and alli pretended we were on Dawson's Creek...pretending we were in that stupid love triangle...I know we were little but deep down I knew that these years would affect the rest of our lives.

I never really watched Dawson's Creek... I kick myself for not watching it now...I connect in everyway to this show...What really got me is that in this episode,"All Good Things...Must Come To An End.", is that  Jen was dying.  I dont know what I would do if any of my friends died.  Before today i started to think that since Im soo far away from all my friends in New York I should give up and move on.  But I realized that I dont want to.  I want to be with them.  I realized that I left behind a whole life in Ny... All my friends helped me grow and become a better person... without them I wouldnt know what to do, or how to live life, or even how to love... I love you all, my new and old friends...I guess I just have to live life like everyday was my last... Just to have fun and not dwell on the bad things in life...Not to be afraid to try new things and not to be afraid to be myself...

Theres one thing I've always wanted.  I want to touch people, change their lives and make them think. 

With that I think I will go now, and hopefully I made everyone think...Ill keep updating hopefully because these are the hardest and best years of my life right now.  Writing just helps me get through this.

Ps.  Jen died in the end of that episode of Dawson's Creek.  I think i did cry, not a physical cry but an emotional cry.  I cried inside.

And always tell someone you love them... even if they already know that you do.  Everyone always feels better when they know they are loved...Dont be afraid to love.  Dont be afraid to share your feelings.  Love is a big and strong word....Only use it when you know its real....

all i have to say is i have the best friends ever! i love you all and miss u all!!!!

i got a new aol s/n if u want to know it leave a comment or email me

wow people must miss me soo much to still be talking bout me in RP.... wow how gay, immature and low life that is .. this kid who i think is anthony ayers and his fag dickheads he hangs out with wrote this

hey u fat fucking pig. u kno when that girl had a seisure and u said u couldnt eat that would be good for u, u fat fuck. i mean rele when u reached 300lbs u should of thought of slim fast or jenny craig. just do us all a favor just run in on to a highway and and get hit by a bus...wait scratch that make it a mac truck bc u would dent the bus. u gay fat fuck

haha you wish... and i have never been 300 lbs in my life not even close.. and anthony ayers needs to stop smoking or he will never grow... haha sorry hes always gonna be a low life gay midget.. sorry HAHA

i dont even care what they say im not even going to that school anymore....

anyway i just got back from the prep rally it was cool... btu i gotta go ttyl bye